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Movies in backwards order 2017 (a new beginning)

New ones in black. Movie count 6. As usual, worst is first. Spoilers in white.


The Great Wall – I mean I dunno. It’s so obviously not an American movie. I think we’re a little too jaded to go for something like this. It almost seemed like a kids movie and it had CG mystical tiger type creatures which I’m not a fan of since Attack of the Clones. I always feel like I can see through them and my brain just stops paying attention to them. It was the same with the wargs in LOTR. But it was fun enough. I couldn’t decide for most of the movie whether I wanted blue or purple armor.

Fist Fight – There was a movie I used to watch when I was back in high school called Three O’ Clock High. This movie either used it as a template or it’s accidentally a lot like it. But in this case it’s a bully teacher against a dweeb teacher instead of bully student against dweeb student. It was mostly funny but there were some jokes that were so poor they should have been cut. Other than that it’s what you expect from the excellent comedy cast. Some laughs and some dumb stuff. That’s what you’re paying for.

A Cure For Wellness Well, I was with it for a long time. It was wonderful to look at and Dane DeHaan was doing a great job but then it seems like halfway through they decided to change what the movie was about. I’m going to do spoilers because otherwise I can’t explain.

Logan – You know, it’s a really good send off for Wolverine. There were a few truly great moments and then there were some things that were over the top and some that were pretty basic, so I don’t think it’s the amazing film most people do. But it’s still very good. Let me get this out the way first. Here’s the last Wolverine movie I would have made. I would have had a film where we learn that Wolverine is aging. There would be other X-men that he associated with like Beast and Storm. They’d be concerned about him and maybe he’d go off on his own. They wouldn’t find out what for sure was happening until Charles detected that he was near death and they attempted to save him. It wouldn’t be some stupid shit like cancer but maybe a new mutant who saps his healing power. I would have had him go out fighting too with some kind of nod to Jean Grey. Ok. So it’s not that. But I did really enjoy Logan. I didn’t like giving Professor X dementia. And if they were going to do it, you would think it would have worldwide effects. I didn’t like the kid but I got used to her. The idea that they’d try to make mutants for their own use makes sense and I feel like that’s going to set up in more detail. The overdone imagery of Wolverine carrying Professor X was great but shouldn’t have happened so much. Professor X should have gone out in a blaze of glory like Logan did. Which it was great to see the beserker roid rage. And it was great that he was back in the forest coming to the aid of new X-men the way he did in the first movie. And the X was the most appropriate and greatest thing ever. So you forgive some of the hammy things like introducing a black family just to kill them all off. lol

Split – Shyamalan is back! I wasn’t sure for most of it. Because you always hear there’s a twist, which you kinda know with him. But it still makes you wait for it, so I’m sitting there thinking well, no this isn’t a twist maybe they didn’t get from the commercial that this was going to happen… oh wait TWIST! TWIST! lol It’s not really a twist though. Imma call it a reveal. Anyway it’s makes a pretty good movie nearly awesome. I really like most of his movies that I’ve seen. I drew the line with that killer tree movie. And I didn’t watch what followed but before that I thought he was gong to make my short list for favorite directors. Well we’ll see what’s next. Hopefully this signals refound mojo. The cast was great, except, for about half of it I was thinking McAvoy should have stayed in his lane. But let’s just say he grew into the role as he went. Buckley I did think was a bit much. The girls were great though. And the one guy who keeps getting typecast as creeps, at least every time I see him, still seems cute to me. I dunno. But you know watching all the subpar Oscar movies this year and then seeing this relegated to January when it’s made by a real director is sort of maddening. I’d really like to see another new movie from him right now.

Get Out – Wow. I did not think I would think this is as great as I do. But it was smart on top of smart. Even the people who like it might not get how awesome it is. Mr. Peele not only wrote a great movie but he directed the pants off of it. I’m thinking of the opening scene with Lakeith Stanfield walking on the dark street. It’s starts there and continues into some very nifty movement and imagery. I’m not going to go into spoilers just let me say that I’m glad that it will be showing people what a certain kind of righteous person really is. They don’t even know it. They’ll watch it and not know it. lol But it’s why I loved this movie. We’ll perhaps go into detail at a later date.






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